Dear College Self…

As a third year college student I’ve learned so many things about myself that I never thought I knew. It’s been a time for growth, reflection, and new beginnings but let’s be honest: nothing comes easy! I’ve partnered with Earnest to write a letter to my past college self, since I am still in college, and to share some of my best advice over my 3 years.

 

Dear Young College Self,

 

WOW…you’ve come a long way since starting college in August 2014! It may have seemed so long ago but little did you know time was going to fly by and you would be here. Over the 3 years you’ve come to learn that many things change and very little will remain the same and it’s important to cherish every single second you’re in college because it’s the best time of your life! There are some things you should know:

Firstly, know that what’s good for someone else may not be good for you whether it’s knowing how you study or doing something your friends are doing. I recall my biology lecture professor telling me, “use logic over your memory to study.” Did it make sense to me? No, but I went with it because as the professor you think it’ll work for you. In the end I didn’t do well in that class because I didn’t trust my gut. You have to find your own way of doing things that makes you comfortable.

Secondly, CREATE A BUDGET FOR YOURSELF! College can be all fun and games until you want to do something fun that costs money that you don’t have! You don’t have to go spending money to do something fun & you don’t have to spend tons of money of fancy food either. I can remember have only $30 left to last me a week. I had a car, which I used to get to and from work, that needed gas, needed food, and wanted to do something fun with my great friend. You can’t complain because let’s be honest…things could be worse. That week I made that $30 stretch far! Instead of going out my friend and I went half on a large pizza and had a “Netflix Movie Night!” With the remaining funds I put $15 in the tank. Budgeting in college is SERIOUS! It’s almost like it’s forcing you to grow up and figuring things out yourself. Being able to budget while in school will set you up for financial success after school. Those student loans kick in just a few months after graduation. The amount that you owe can seem like you will never be able to pay it back. But believe me, you will! Consider looking into resource who can help save you money by refinancing your studentloans Money doesn’t make the fun because you can make your own fun.

LIVE A LITTLE! Yes, it’s important to study and earn the good grades. Yes, it’s important to go to class but again college is supposed to be the best years of your life too! Sometimes a good friend and a full tank of gas can take you anywhere! Take a 1 Day Road Trip and see where it takes you, go out for a night on the town, and go to that party! Have some fun and enjoy yourself even if that means getting all dolled up just to go out to eat.

College is your opportunity to meet your “Forever friends.” These are the friends that will most likely be in your wedding. Just know that everyone you meet in college aren’t your “forever friends.” There are very few friendships that will actually make out of college while the others will simply fade away. Just know that you can’t hold on to all of your relationships and force them to work because all relationships have a purpose. It’s better to have 4 quarters than 100 pennies because less is always so much more!

Also remember that everything passes and nothing is a bad as it seems. Thing may seem hard at that moment in time BUT it will pass and things will always get better within time.

College is an amazing adventure. Think positive, follow your heart. chase your dreams, appreciate the time you have there, live in the moment the best you can, and most importantly love yourself and grow each day!

 

Wishing you all the best, love, and joy,

~Your Older College Self

Insecurities in Relationships…

You know I’ve always wondered what drives someone in a relationship to be insecure? For the most part I know for a fact that it can be related past relationships but what about insecurities in life? Can insecurities from your past life effect your relationship?

Well I think it can!

The reason I am bringing this up is because of what’s been happening lately in a friends former relationship. Constant lying, cheating  arguing? Isn’t a relationship suppose to be built on trust  loyalty at least?

But here’s my main question: Should you allow past relationships & past life issues affect your relationship with the one you love?

You shouldn’t allow ANYTHING to effect your relationship! The quotes:

“Once Bitten Twice Shy.”

Is PERFECT when it comes to insecurity in relationships but you don’t have to live by it. Being insecure about ANYTHING in your relationship can drive anyone to be clingy & sometimes being too clingy can cause a problem. You have to be with that person 24/7 to assure yourself that the other person isn’t doing “anything wrong” & your partner may feel like they have NO space. Making assumptions just digs you into a grave you can’t climb out of.

You see problems that simply do not exist.

Now what about the other person? Their main question is: “Have I done something to piss he or she off?” When usually the answer is no.

Sometimes we have to put our past relationship & life choices on the back burners. You can’t create imaginary scenario’s. Separate you imagination from reality because they are two different worlds.

Spend time apart so both of ya’ll can breathe! Now I cant lie, if I see you 24/7 at some point I am going to choke you!

Don’t twist each others words and most importantly don’t compare your past relationships with your current relationship. You have to focus on the good and if your past relationships ended in Hell then how do you think this relationship will end if you keep repeating the same things over and over again?

Now I’m not saying you have to be 1,000% secure but at least be secure to a degree where you can trust one another & you aren’t questioning the loyalty & trust of your partner. You should be happy but you can’t find happiness if you are constantly wondering “what if.”

“At the end of the day, the goals are simple: safety and security.”

  ~Jodi Rell

Importance of Education

Hey ya’ll! As ya’ll know I have changed my major from nutrition to special education but I am creating this post to give some advice to students all over the world who struggle with school.

Now me personally growing up going through school I actually liked going (weird yes I know but let me explain)! School was an escape for me. School became my home away from home where I met new people, learned new things and widened my horizons to the world.

Then in 2008 middle school started (2008-2010) & school became HELL for me! I was always in constant arguments, rumors about me went around the school and people began to see me as some type of monster! At this point in time I had a found HATRED for school. Waking up in the morning just to go was hard and on some days I just wanted to say “I’M DONE!”

But a certain teacher made me see things differently. My then AVID teacher, Mrs. AJ Hicks, became like a mentor to me. When I was down she always lifted my spirits. When I needed an adult to talk to, she was always there. She brought back the joy of going to school although middle school was the WORST 2yrs of my life and I have literally wiped everything that occurred from my memory except her talks.

I can honestly say that there was a huge turn around for me once I started high school in 2010. I started my journey as a colorguard member and it’s like I had a family away from family because the colorguard became family for me! Through my 4 years of high school I participated in colorguard for 3 of those years until some wrong doing that made me end my journey. But it’s like I was still a member because I was, and still, am close to some of the girls.

And the magical day came for me. June 01, 2014….the day I graduated high school! It was the best feeling in the world to know that I survived 13 years (kindergarten-12th grade) of school and finally received my diploma! I graduated at the top 25% of my class with a rank of 102 out of 489 students. Let me tell you it made me feel PROUD!

Now here is the moral of this post & YES my post has a moral! Education is IMPORTANT! In this lifetime in order to get a high paying job…NO…the CAREER of your choice…you MUST have a high school diploma! PERIOD! There are many student I hear that skip class or drop out of school because it’s “too hard” or because they are hanging with the wrong crowd. Let me tell you that’s not going to get you anywhere in life! Why miss out on a free education? I don’t see the point…do you? (It’s different if you go to private school)

It doesn’t get any better in college either! I’ll admit in college you get a little bit of breathing room because your parents aren’t on your case about your grades, your away from home (unless otherwise) and you can make some of your own decisions. But there’s a difference between public school (in my case) and college: YOU ARE PAYING FOR IT (well your parents are). So you skip that math class for 3 weeks straight but when you’re ready to go that professor says “you are no longer welcomed in my class & you’ll receive an F as your final grade.” Then what will you do?

See in college there is no “make-up” days. There’s no summer school for that class to earn credit. It’s simply you pass it the first time round or you pay to retake it again!

So if you don’t like school then find a reason to like it! Find what motivates you: a teacher, a family member or even a future career you may want! Find a few friends (and by a few I mean like 3-5) that have something going for themselves (which means they are always in class, never skip and do their work). You may have a favorite subject let that motivate you! For me I enjoyed history, colorguard and lunch!

Just find that drive that you have and put it to good use. Let’s be honest: a cell phone can only get you so far.

Now I leave you with this quote:

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad.
~ Theodore Roosevelt
Is skipping out on your education more important than receiving one?

Kylie Jenner Challenge…

So as of yesterday I have heard about this Kylie Jenner Challenge (#KylieJennerChallenge) and of course I had to do some investigating. Now let me tell you what I “discovered.” Teenagers and even some adults are making the attempt to get their lips like Kylie Jenner’s by placing their lips, or their “other” body parts into a bottle of some sort such as a soda bottle for a long period of time maybe 5minutes or even longer. When this “process” is done your lips will be not only bigger but they will be swollen…

Now my first thought when I read about this challenge was “What the hell? Why would anyone want to do this foolishness? It is bullshit if you ask me (excuse my language by the way but it was my thought).” I don’t understand how ANYONE can do this to themselves just so they can have lips like Kyle Jenner of all people. I wouldn’t want to look like Kylie nor any of her sisters for that matter. For what? So I can die trying?

Cutting off your blood circulation by placing my lips, or other body parts as I mentioned, in a bottle just to make them bigger is just ridiculous. What happened to being your own person? Being who you are? This is why society is all screwed up because people believe that they have to do ANY and EVERYTIHNG in their power to look like these celebrities but in reality many celebrities don’t even look like themselves!  They have alterations just like your “trying” to and I have an issue with this because many of these celebrities may say, “Be yourself.” How can you tell anyone to be themselves if you aren’t going to do the same?

So here is the point I’m trying to make: Do NOT try to be like Kylie Jenner for her lips, Beyoncé for her vocals or any other celebrity because there is only ONE you and you can’t spend your life trying to be like all these celebrities because they aren’t going to pay any attention to the fact. People are going to pay attention to you for being you for looking like you not for looking like them.

Thoughts Going DEEP on a FRIDAY!

Good morning to all & a round of fuzzy socks! So lets get right into this if we shall. All last night I had some things on my mind and I was trying to  sleep so you can tell I had some issues on the brain.

I am always giving friends advice, older friends and younger friends, when they need it most or when they ask for my advice. But as of last night I began to wonder if the advice I give to them is good advice or if it can actually help them out in the long run. Sometimes it’s just in the back of my mind that I am NO help to my friends.

Although they tell me that’s great advice I often think they are not being truthful with me. But I know that my advice does help some of them because they tell me the results of listening to me but then again I could be wrong and things could just simply backfire. That is all I have to say for now. Love ya’ll, stay warm & have a great day!

 

Signed,

Erriel J

College Craziness with Sisters

So today, as I mentioned in my previous post, I not only talked to avid classes but I also got to see some of my guard sisters and see my Halee Bug (she is also in colorguard BUT she has called me mama since day 1 so she is my child). I have 3 guard sisters who are seniors (Camille, Jalexia & Sydni)  and will be graduating high school in May or June which meant I knew they would possibly ask questions about college and anything relating to college which did happen actually from Camille and Jalexia.

Now I am not telling them, “YOU NEED TO GO TO MY SCHOOL BECAUSE SAY SO!” But I am telling them to apply for as many scholarships as possible, take those college tours and go to the college that not only accepts you but the college that “has your heart (hope that makes sense to you).” As a “big sister” I do want them to be able to get that education that they want so they can pursue their future careers. You can call me a big fluffy softy but I don’t mind haha!